Monday, December 13, 2004
And We Always Thought He Was Such a Nice Boy
Monday morning items and comments from here and there, hither and yon, etc.
Item: Karl Rove has another idea from the Evil Genius playbook--appoint Democratic senators from states with Repug governors to adminstration positions, thus opening the way for the governor to appoint a Repug replacement, thereby strengthening the Repug majority in the Senate.
Comment: First up: Joe Lieberman as Secretary of Homeland Security. If asked to take over Homeland Security, Lieberman will run to the press conference and accept--not because he isn't smart enough to see through Rove's gambit (even though he isn't), but because he still seems to believe that the problem in Washington is that not enough Democrats are willing to play nice with the Republicans. So he takes the gig and the Republicans move one vote closer to a filibuster-proof majority in the Senate. Rove twirls his mustache and thinks, hey, Joe, here's your lovely parting gift and thanks for playing our game.
Item: Today is the day the Electoral College meets in the 50 state capitals to certify a Bush victory. The votes are not officially counted until January, as they must be sent to Washington via stagecoach, packet boat, and carrier pigeon.
Comment: There will be protests in Ohio, although if John Kerry had won Ohio by means as questionable as Bush has, rabid Repugs would burn the fucking statehouse down. Last week, Slate's Timothy Noah dreamed of finding 18 faithless electors to turn the election for Kerry, but even he knows he's dreaming in vain. Because if they did, rapid Repugs would burn the fucking country down.
Item: Frank Rich of the New York Times examines the controversy over the movie Kinsey and observes that wingnuts are, in the end, not just anti-abortion or anti-promiscuity or anti-pornography, they're opposed to sex in general.
Comment: Well, sure they are. Because if they weren't, they'd be in favor of birth control, which they aren't. They're opposed to anything but in-the-dark, man-on-top, married, heterosexual couplings for the purposes of procreation, to make more little homeschooled pod-people who can grow up to do battle 30 years from now against whatever cultural rot offends people then. I am reminded of the words of that great philosopher George Carlin, who once said: "Have you ever noticed that the people who are against abortion are people you wouldn't want to fuck anyway?"
Item: The FCC has requested NBC's tapes of the opening cermonies of the Athens Olympics, reportedly because of one indecency complaint.
Comment: "Merle? I think I saw a penis! Did you see a penis? I think I saw a penis!" Apparently the FCC is going to start looking into individual indecency complaints one-by-one, without determining whether they're valid or just the hysterical reaction of someone with time on his or her hands--fitting for an agency that seems to have a similar problem. (What's offensive about the opening ceremonies of the Olympics, it's the relentlessly European artistic touches that leave Americans bored silly and waiting for A) something to blow up or B) a pop singer to jump out of it.)
Item: I have now used the words "fucking" (twice), "fuck" (once), and "penis" (three times) in this post. (Three times, twice, and four times if you count this summary.)
Comment: In this year's letter that goes in the Christmas cards, I mention that my primary hobby is blogging, and then give the URL. Good thing I haven't sent it yet.
Monday morning items and comments from here and there, hither and yon, etc.
Item: Karl Rove has another idea from the Evil Genius playbook--appoint Democratic senators from states with Repug governors to adminstration positions, thus opening the way for the governor to appoint a Repug replacement, thereby strengthening the Repug majority in the Senate.
Comment: First up: Joe Lieberman as Secretary of Homeland Security. If asked to take over Homeland Security, Lieberman will run to the press conference and accept--not because he isn't smart enough to see through Rove's gambit (even though he isn't), but because he still seems to believe that the problem in Washington is that not enough Democrats are willing to play nice with the Republicans. So he takes the gig and the Republicans move one vote closer to a filibuster-proof majority in the Senate. Rove twirls his mustache and thinks, hey, Joe, here's your lovely parting gift and thanks for playing our game.
Item: Today is the day the Electoral College meets in the 50 state capitals to certify a Bush victory. The votes are not officially counted until January, as they must be sent to Washington via stagecoach, packet boat, and carrier pigeon.
Comment: There will be protests in Ohio, although if John Kerry had won Ohio by means as questionable as Bush has, rabid Repugs would burn the fucking statehouse down. Last week, Slate's Timothy Noah dreamed of finding 18 faithless electors to turn the election for Kerry, but even he knows he's dreaming in vain. Because if they did, rapid Repugs would burn the fucking country down.
Item: Frank Rich of the New York Times examines the controversy over the movie Kinsey and observes that wingnuts are, in the end, not just anti-abortion or anti-promiscuity or anti-pornography, they're opposed to sex in general.
Comment: Well, sure they are. Because if they weren't, they'd be in favor of birth control, which they aren't. They're opposed to anything but in-the-dark, man-on-top, married, heterosexual couplings for the purposes of procreation, to make more little homeschooled pod-people who can grow up to do battle 30 years from now against whatever cultural rot offends people then. I am reminded of the words of that great philosopher George Carlin, who once said: "Have you ever noticed that the people who are against abortion are people you wouldn't want to fuck anyway?"
Item: The FCC has requested NBC's tapes of the opening cermonies of the Athens Olympics, reportedly because of one indecency complaint.
Comment: "Merle? I think I saw a penis! Did you see a penis? I think I saw a penis!" Apparently the FCC is going to start looking into individual indecency complaints one-by-one, without determining whether they're valid or just the hysterical reaction of someone with time on his or her hands--fitting for an agency that seems to have a similar problem. (What's offensive about the opening ceremonies of the Olympics, it's the relentlessly European artistic touches that leave Americans bored silly and waiting for A) something to blow up or B) a pop singer to jump out of it.)
Item: I have now used the words "fucking" (twice), "fuck" (once), and "penis" (three times) in this post. (Three times, twice, and four times if you count this summary.)
Comment: In this year's letter that goes in the Christmas cards, I mention that my primary hobby is blogging, and then give the URL. Good thing I haven't sent it yet.
