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Monday, October 31, 2005

Tootsie Rolls: the Devil's Tool
It's been noted by better writers than me that one of the problems with Christianity is that you, as a human being, can't really win. If you succeed at something, God is responsible for your success, but if you fail, you failed, or you let God down in some way. And the whole enterprise is pretty tricky, too: Sometimes, even when you think you're doing good, you're doing wrong, and maybe without even knowing it.

Imagine that you are a hardcore fundie, and that you believe Halloween is evil, sick, bad, and wrong. But because you live in a neighborhood with lots of other families, many of whom do not share your beliefs and who will permit their kids to go trick-or-treating tonight, you decide to participate in the Halloween fun by handing out anti-Halloween religious tracts. Jesus gives you brownie points for that, right?

Wrong.
Giving any kind of treat when someone knocks at your door on Halloween night is participating in Halloween. Just because you add a tract to the treat (or give only a tract) does not sanctify this Halloween activity. Giving a tract while you engage in the ritual that Satan takes very seriously (the trick-or-treating ritual is a satanic ritual no matter how cute it looks or how much fun it is) will not give your or your child automatic protection from evil spirit contact. You are sinning and thereby breaking God's protective hedge. The serpent will bite you and your children, tract or no tract.
Or, as World O'Crap observes, giving out tracts "is just as bad as sacrificing virgins to Lucifer." For your Halloween-morning reading pleasure, World O'Crap has an extensive takedown of anti-Halloween fundies, featuring the unparallelled unintentional hilarity of Jack Chick tracts.

Recommended Reading: Orcinus, on "liberal fascism," which is neither, and on Michelle Malkin, clever simulation of professional journalist.

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