Monday, March 13, 2006

More Snowballs in Hell
I've hinted at this before, but I'm happy to go on record with it today: It's the official position of this blog that the Democratic Party will find a way to lose the 2008 presidential election. It doesn't matter who the Repugs put up; the Democrats will find a way to blow it. They'll do it by nominating someone unelectable, like Hillary, or they'll do it by irreparably damaging an electable candidate in the primary season, or they'll do it by letting their candidate be swiftboated over the summer, or they'll do it in some other way--but barring some truly spectacular event on the Repug side, the Democrats will lose in 2008. (And that's assuming the election isn't jacked by the voting machines.)

But let's leave all that aside for a moment. Assume that the Democrats find an electable candidate and the voting machines return a fair result. The nightmare scenario for Democrats can be summed up in two words: John McCain.

I knew perfectly rational and quite liberal Democrats who, in 2000, said they could see themselves voting for McCain. There was sympathy all around when he was viciously smeared by the Bush gang during the 2000 primaries. Since then, he's got that whole plainspoken, war-hero, sculpted-from-granite thing down pretty good--and he's carefully cultivated the image of a maverick. If McCain were to get the Repug nom in 2008, millions of independents would vote for him, and more than a few Democrats would probably do so too. He'd be unbeatable.

With the Repugs having held their first '08 straw poll this past weekend (won by Nurse Frist, on his home field), it's time to start disabusing independents and liberals of the notion that McCain is selling something they might want to buy. Paul Krugman got off to a fine start this morning. Although the New York Times has it behind its subscription wall (and you can look it up--their policy has rendered the Times' op-ed columnists a lot less visible on the Web, and thus less influential), Tennessee Guerilla Women posted the whole thing. And here's the money paragraph:
When the cameras are rolling, Mr. McCain can sometimes be seen striking a brave pose of opposition to the White House. But when it matters, when the Bush administration's ability to do whatever it wants is at stake, Mr. McCain always toes the party line.
So much so, that he's actually the third-most conservative member of the Senate.

In other words, he's the perfect candidate to hoodwink millions of voters--and hoodwinkery is the best way for a Repug to get elected to anything from dog catcher on up. Thus, that makes him the perfect successor to King George. Start saying it now: Friends don't let friends vote for John McCain.

On the Democratic side, we have the first candidate into the presidential race who's guaranteed to be out before the first votes are cast. The question of the day is clearly this: How many meteors would have to strike the planet before he'd have a snowball's chance in Hell?

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